What if, at first, we got really clear on how we actually wanted to feel in our life and then laid out our intentions? What if your most desired feelings consciously informed how you plan your day, your year, your career, your holidays — your life?
That’s the crux of creating your Desire Map and it’s a process I’m guiding a group of women through in a day-long workshop/retreat on Saturday, April 4th, in Louisville.
Registration is open and I want you to be there. This is the golden ticket — it’s poetic- meets-practical life planning.
Each day this week, I will share one of my five Core Desired Feelings and what that looks like in “real life” for me. On deck today? Authenticity.
1. worthy of trust, reliance, or belief
2. having a verifiable origin, not copied
3. genuine, real, true, undoubted
Really, it boils down to unabashedly, lovingly, messily and beautifully being myself. And how does that come through in my daily existence or in the future I’m creating for myself?
- Authenticity is expressed in my loyalty, connection and unwavering love for my family. The commitment to a life as a wife and a parent keeps me keepin’ it real; it’s breathtaking, confounding, monotonous, joyful, boring, irritating and nothing short of a miracle. I’m all-in for every chapter of the story and am poignantly and hilariously honest about it — every dip and crescendo.
- I can walk into any environment and intuitively understand how to approach and communicate with people in a way that is genuine and true — not just polite or artful conversation. The “energy” of a place is palpable to me no matter if I walk into a space where there are two people or 200. I can be who I am and connect, listen to and understand others like a sixth sense. I used to think that maybe this was part of a “people pleasing” side of myself — the desire sculpt myself into a situation for acceptance. I’ve learned and have decided, however, that I value approachability. It builds bridges and connection and it’s born of love, really. Love is the core of my authenticity.
- I am vulnerable. I step up and share thoughts, emotions and stories. When I love, I love. When I am moved, I cry. Or I hug you. I get angry and I fuss or yell. Sometimes I get quiet, but overall, I don’t value a life of “things left unsaid.” Do I perceive that this bites me in the ass sometimes? Yep. Does it mean I feel tremendous joy and freedom? Yep.
- I want you to like me. I do. That’s been with me for a long, long time. It’s part people-pleasing and part desire for connection. What I’ve come to understand about myself more and more in my 40s, though? I want me to like me. And I don’t want to trade that for your or some other entity’s approval. I’m still working on what this means for me every single day.
- When I write, I stand in my authenticity.
- When I dance, I stand in my authenticity.
- Whenever I am with my family, I stand in my authenticity.
- When I talk with other women and we share stories and laughter, I stand in my authenticity.
- When I am moving my body in the gym and and feel either invincible or like I don’t know if I can keep going (but do), I stand in my authenticity.
What does authenticity look like in your life? Where and when do you feel most like yourself? Where do you hide? Where do you feel like you shine? Who sees you for who you really are? How can you show others who you really are?
3 thoughts on “Core Desired Feeling: Authentic”
March 9, 2015
“I want me to like me” is only one of the things in this beautiful piece that stands out as a connection I share with you. I hear you and I understand that it’s something you practice every day. Thanks for putting yourself out there consistently and being REAL. I love reading your blog!!
March 10, 2015
Thank you, Stacy. We’ve got to offer that up to ourselves first — I spent a lot of time waiting for validation from other people — some of them didn’t even know it (lol). And it is a practice; I was talking with my own coach about that this morning — how I’ve let go of some of my practices that help me stay most mentally healthy and connected to myself. Feels good to know I’ve got my own back.
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