I just got off a fantastic coaching call with one of my clients where we talked about some big dreams and goals she’s making happen in her life.
People who don’t really know much about coaching or lump it into the realm of psychotherapy (they’re not the same), have usually heard that coaching has something to do with working towards … dreams and goals.
That’s true — and there’s a lot more to it than that.
First of all, everyone has their definition of what dreams and goals are.
I’ve got clients who want to work on everything from feeling strong and healthy in their bodies, to starting a new business, to getting out of a rut and figuring out what the hell their dreams and goals actually are.
So how do I, as a coach, honor that quest and give my client the best tools to find their way in our work together?
I’ve got tools for days, but there’s one that always comes when I help a client determine her path to those big desires.
Today, this came out of my mouth and I had to take a moment to write it down:
“You’ll keep moving towards the bigger things you want in your life if you pay attention to and act upon the little things.”
I actually coach from that perspective quite a lot — it just comes out in different ways. Sometimes I refer to it as taking “simple yet significant” steps, but the way it came out in today’s session rang my client’s bell : ) .
I pay attention when that happens. There’s gold there when that “aha!” moment rears its head.
That’s where my client starts to see that what feels like a too-big-to-envision-or-create conception of their lives is totally do-able.
It takes time. It takes focus. It takes commitment. And it can start with the smallest change. Paying attention to and taking action around the little things yields big change over time.
I’ve had a client whose dream was to open an eclectic storefront gift shop. She had a full time job, a young family, and just couldn’t see how this was going to happen any time soon. Too overwhelming. Too many moving parts.
But she wouldn’t let this go. It was too important to her.
She held onto her dream. She regularly did her research.
She kept herself excited and interested in the details of her dream.
What would she sell? What would her ideal customer look like? What would that customer be looking for? How would my client speak to this customer? What would she offer her?
In her dedication to her big and the little things she did to nurture it, the possibility of on online store popped up … what if she could begin there and see what the interest was?
I’ll tell you what … she is killin’ it. Every time I see her on Facebook Live doing her thing and showing us her wares, she is all lit up inside.
She is having fun. She is working. She’s raising her family. She’s sharing her workouts on social media because she knows taking care of her body is also taking care of her dream.
These are the “little” tributaries that lead to the big dreams, people. THIS is why I coach and what I coach. And it works.
The client on today’s call also has her dream. We talked about those little things that lead to the big life and what that would look like for her — that’s how I give homework, y’all.
I positioned it as what if she could give herself a “10% nudge.” Instead of feeling weighed down by seeing “complete modules 1 – 5 for four hours on Sunday,” what if she could dig into 10% of that? And then 10% on another day and then another.
In terms of taking care of her body, she loves to go to Orange Theory, but she’s got two little kids, a spouse, a house and full-time job — she’s got to bust her ass to make it happen. It takes a lot. Been there, sister.
It didn’t feel good or true for her to map out a plan to “get child care and go to Orange Theory three days every single week.”
Here’s what did feel good: Set the goal to go to Orange Theory one day a week when her husband could be with the babies. Add some more percentage points by taking 10 – 15 minutes of her lunch break and walking the property around the office building. Could she do that two days a week? Could she add a third day?
She can do that.
Allllll of that leads to the big dream. There’s not one damn piece of it that is irrelevant or insignificant.
That’s what I coach. That’s how my clients roll with me. And that’s also how my body dropped the weight it didn’t need any more six years ago. That’s how I left my job and became a full-time coach three years ago.
Little became the new big.
Here’s your homework today:
LAVISH, Saturday, September 23, 2017
When I bring women together, magic happens. I know that’s quite a claim for a dinner party, and I stand by it wholeheartedly.
Lavish is an evening I’ve created that’s inspirational, fun, soulful and glamorous. I have a “special sauce” within me where I can create an environment and facilitate an experience that lets women play and feel free, and then leave ready to take on the world … and do something about it.
Here’s what past attendees have said about Lavish:
“Thank you, Laura, for an amazing night. I truly appreciate the generous gift of being able to come and feel the support and love from you guys. With this crazy busy life I live to have a wonderful dinner in a beautiful room gave me a feeling of lightness and peace. I truly treasure that.”
“This filled my soul — every single one of you ladies are powerhouses! Thank you for showing me the possibilities in life.”
“Because of this night, I am now purposely slowing down, and these tiny whisperings and magical incantations are screaming at me. I GET IT now. I am listening. I am woke!!! Lavish and love are indeed the answers.”
Those are just a few words of Lavish love.
Best friends have met, businesses were created, and travel plans were made — just to name a few of the Lavish dreams come true.
What could happen for you as a result of that one night this fall?
What’s the fire you want to light to carry you through the last season of 2017 and beyond?
Find out by joining me and a group of incredible women for the next Lavish evening on Saturday, September 23 at Wiltshire on Market in Louisville.
Space is limited, so get your seat at the Lavish table now: www.laura-wagner.com/lavish.
BE GOLDEN CONFERENCE, October 5 – 7, 2017
Have I told you yet that I have the honor and privilege to present a workshop at this conference in Bloomington, Indiana, October 5 – 7?
And you should see the lineup of the other workshop presenters … holy tacos: http://begoldenstaygolden.com/workshop-leaders/
Of course I’m gonna say “yes” to teach and inspire when the mission is:
“…to provide a collaborative space to inspire and empower individuals to lead their most authentic lives—to be golden. Through conversation and connection at our multi-day experience, let’s spark that pivotal change and push one another to live unapologetically.”
And the keynotes are my BFF / partner Susan Hyatt, Awesomely Luvvie and Elliott Sanders — that’s a crew I’m proud to run with.
It’s going to be magic. Sign up. Come be with us. Amplify your life.