Four years ago this week, I embarked on a journey that I thought was the end to a chapter in my life, but later found it was really the beginning of learning what I was made of and my work to do in the world.
My little boy was born in Lihue, Kauai in the state of Hawaii on May 1st and we celebrated his fourth birthday this week. I love telling the almost fairytale-like story of the 3 a.m. phone call from the adoption worker and finding a ticket for literally one of the last flights out of Louisville on the weekend of the Kentucky Derby. My husband and little girl would follow me on a separate flight the next day, so they hugged me goodbye and watched me walk through the security gate at dawn.
For the first time in the nearly four years of trying to have a second child biologically and through international or domestic adoption, I was alone on a 747 traveling 4300 miles away and I was not afraid. At all. I met myself on those flights. Louisville to Detroit. Detroit to Seattle. Seattle to Honolulu. Honolulu to Lihue. Everything I’d ever experienced up to that point made wildly poetic and perfect sense; there was no other way it could have unfolded and I knew it in every cell of my body.
Every ultrasound, every vial of blood drawn and every specialist who tried to figure out why my body would not carry another baby to term. Every one of the three D&Cs where my husband held my hand and made me laugh-cry. Every moment I tried to help my girl understand when she was 4, 5, and 6 years old why we were sad and that our family would be okay no matter what.
That’s when I learned what courage was. That being soft was also being strong. Every hard choice and every moment of resignation was a bridge to something better than my too-shy-to-speak-of dreams. That all I ever was in every moment was more than enough. Trust. Show up. Step in. Be present. I will know what to do. Just like I knew how to navigate 90 miles of coastline at night in a rental car on an island where I never imagined I’d be.
The grace of that journey blanketed every aspect of my life, including my career; so the celebration of my son’s adoption and the completion of our family was also the birth of my mission to creatively serve others through my work as a therapist, coach and writer. What can I do for you — “my people” — who land here, see my face and wonder how I can serve you?
Here is what I know for sure: I help people who are in the position of making hard choices about relationships — whether it’s with a partner, family, friends, work or my most favorite — yourself. I come packing laser-sharp intuition, mad clinical and school-of-life skills along with a fierce mix of warmth, truth and patience. I’m all about helping my people build more hope and loving bridges in their worlds so there are fewer detours through resignation, hopelessness and fear. I will walk with you so you can learn for yourself that every challenge you’ve faced and every decision you’ve made is the framework for you to step into your own grace.
Susan Ribar
May 4, 2012
Wow, Laura! That’s soooo inspiring. I understand the joy of holding that baby in your arms after years of fertility treatment. All the heartbreak and frustration is totally worth it in that moment and all the moments to come. Our children and our families are such a blessing. Thanks for sharing this and yourself with us. Love you! Susan
Lori Kalodimos
May 4, 2012
You drew me in with your words, and painted a beautifully inspiring journey. We all have our journey and reading about yours and the birth of purpose, fortified with grace is so powerful. Your words, power me on to face my dark night journey on the wings of grace as I make my “imaginary” flight to Hawaii !! I trust through grace that I can also navigate the costal areas of places I never thought I would be. Thank you for your words. You are a gift and an inspiration to all who know you and have a chance to be guided by your strength and hope.
Deb
May 5, 2012
Laura, You just wrote our story from twenty years ago with the exception that she is our third child and she was born in Korea. I felt your emotion as you shared your heart, and know that you will be a blessing to those you counsel on similar journeys. Thanks so much for sharing this and reminding those who are discouraged not to give up hope.